“Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your head.”
Martin Mull (American Actor. b.1943, Chicago, Illinois, USA)
TIME: 12:14 PM
PLACE: Edisons, Edwardsville
SUBJECT: Bowling scores
The annual family event for my work.
My boy thought he could beat me at bowling.
When he realized he couldn’t win by pin counts, he decided to see who could heave the ball down the lane the fastest.
He did win that feat of strength.
“Having children is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain”
Martin Mull (American Actor. b.1943, Chicago, Illinois, USA)
TIME: 10:12 AM
PLACE: Bowling Alley
SUBJECT: StellaDella
I signed the kids up at www.kidsbowlfree.com. We live pretty close to the bowling alley so I figured this would be an inexpensive thing to do this summer. We only have to pay for shoe rental. (When did THAT go up to $3.00 a pair?) DramaQueen became frustrated because she kept making gutter balls, and groused that SD only did well because SHE had the bumpers when she bowled. I pointed out that SD was 6 and when DQ was 6, SHE used the bumpers as well. Also, it had been some time since she bowled and with this program, she should get better at it each time we went. DQ then sulked that she didn’t want to bowl anymore because “it’s too hard.” Too bad, girlie, I told her, we’re going bowling this summer *and* she and MonkeyBoy are going to learn how to manually keep score. It’s good math practice and knowing how to figure a bowling score is something everyone should know how to do. I got the old eye rolls from DQ when I announced this. I’m such a mean mom who likes to torture her children. I live for it.
Walter Sobchak: OVER THE LINE!
Smokey: Huh?
Walter Sobchak: I'm sorry, Smokey. You were over the line, that's a foul.
Smokey: Bullshit. Mark it 8, Dude.
Walter Sobchak: Uh, excuse me. Mark it zero. Next frame.
Smokey: Bullshit, Walter. Mark it 8, Dude.
Walter Sobchak: Smokey, this is not 'Nam. This is bowling. There are rules.
Ethan Coen & Joel Coen. John Goodman, Jimmie Dale Gilmore. The Big Lebowski (1998).
TIME: 5:54 PM
PLACE: Bowling alley hallway
SUBJECT: Bowling lockers
A busy Saturday. We had a 9am doctor’s appointment, then haircuts for HandsomeHusband and StellaDella; at noon we traveled to my father-in-law’s hometown for a Little League fundraiser (turtle soup!); then we headed back to town for a Cystic Fibrosus bowling fundraiser at 3:30pm. Our family, my dad, a friend of MonkeyBoy’s and a friend of DramaQueen’s bowled three games. We finished up a little before 6pm, then headed home. I ordered and picked up pizzas for dinner. After dinner I ran DQ’s friend back to her house where she picked up a change of clothes and pajamas so she could spend the night here at our house. OK, I think I’m done now.
“Your bowling ball's not in the lane,” said Tom gutturally.
Tom Swifty
TIME: 7:33 PM
PLACE: South Belt West
SUBJECT: Bowling Alley sign
I ended up working again from 8:45am-2:30pm today. As it is Tuesday, the kids had football and cheerleading practice at 6pm. While the kids practiced and HH coached, I went to a fundraiser for our state representative at this bowling alley. Usually HH goes, but he had to coach tonight, so I represented him at the fundraiser for our representative. (Hee hee – that always makes me laugh and yes, I am a goofball!) The soirée was in the lower level banquet room of the facility. I had a soothing adult beverage and all manner of appetizers. It was quite nice. A trivia note: this banquet facility is the same one where HH and I had our wedding reception 14 years ago on April 1st, 1995.
